It's Every Monkey for Themselves
Claire Low, Wimmera News

Pursuing capuchin monkeys in the jungles of Costa Rica, Canberra research assistant Vanessa Woods fought off killer bees and had steamy conquests with fellow researchers.

Born in Ainslie, the 29-year-old fled Canberra nursing a broken heart to live in the jungle with eight other research assistants. She recounted her tales at an Australian National University public lecture this week to promote her book It's every monkey for themselves. She plans to help endangered bonobo monkeys with 10 per cent of her profits.

Former Cosmopolitan editor Mia Freedman labelled Ms Woods's literary effort "Sex in the City meets Tarzan meets Gorillas in the Mist".

Ms Woods said the secret to jungle survival was strong friendships.

"The monkeys have all sorts of lessons in life for all of us," she said.

"Number one is to really maintain your friends. The monkeys were vicious, ugly creatures but they were really good at friendships."

Capuchin society was "vicious, violent and obsessed with sex".

The isolation and intensity of the jungle turned all the researchers primal, she said. "We turned into monkeys. By the end of it you couldn't tell the difference.

"When we are [isolated and confined] we revert to primate behaviours ... you either want to spend the rest of your life with someone, or stab their eyeball out with a fork."

One parallel between life with fellow research assistants and primate behaviour she observed was the struggle for hierarchy. The way to move up in the hierarchy was to have a sexual relationship with someone higher, she said.

Two relationships later, Ms Woods had moved from the bottom to the top. She said her almost-alpha status was thwarted when she nearly died after she was stung by a bee.

Honey bees in South America were created by cross breeding with aggressive African bees and now they flourish. A hive can launch 20,000 bees in 15 seconds. Ms Woods nearly died from an allergic reaction after she was stung.

Other adventures included contact with a plant that injects poison.

"You use a leaf to wipe your bottom, then it feels like you've got a wasp in your pants," she said.

Her most memorable monkey moment was when a grieving mother capuchin whose baby had just died defecated on her from a higher branch when Ms Woods was also going to the toilet. "I thought, she's going through such a tough time, but still had the gumption to poo on my head and laugh about it."

It's Every Monkey for Themselves by Vanessa Woods is billed as a true story of sex, love and lies in the jungle.